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This is the first birthday where I'm really feeling how objectively worse my life has gotten in the past year. How do I deal with that? (hexbear.net)
submitted 2 years ago by to c/chat@hexbear.net
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Last year I was employed at a decent paying job with good benefits, doing work that mattered. Now I'm seven months unemployed, out of benefits and still getting ghosted by employers. Most everything else has remained the same (no friends, uncertainty with my gender and how I want to live my life, stuck living with my mom) except that I started seeing a therapist ~10 months ago who I really like.

It just feels really, really bad. I'm assuming other people have had this experience in their life already (I am both fairly young and a late bloomer in most respects), so I guess I'm asking how you dealt with it and how things got better, assuming they did :aware:

you can also commiserate with me if you like

thanks gamers

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[–] 5 points 2 years ago (12 children)

No, it doesn't. Not everyone has a family/social network in place to help them achieve their goals. Moreover, creating a united front depends on having people with the skills/willingness to attempt new things with new people. If you want collective action you need people who are secure enough to try new things. Back in the day the IWW promoted 'self help' programs like teaching kids to paint, sing, or orate. They offered adult classes, too.

You're telling people not to use the books, and don't offer any alternative.

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  • [–] 6 points 2 years ago* (6 children)

    A "learn to cook" book isn't a self help book. It's a cook book.

    A "house-repairs" book isn't a self help book. It's a DIY book.

    You are either misunderstanding the topic, or are being deliberately obtuse. Self help books transpose problems caused by capitalism into a problem with the individual and then tell the individual they need to change who they are and take part in hustle culture and understand that their motivational problems to grind grind grind caused by worker-alienation are actually problems with them as a human being that they need to change. Self help diverts attention away from the source of problems that capitalism is causing, aiming to treat the symptoms of these problems as a diversion away from recognising the cause.

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  • [–] 1 point 2 years ago* (3 children)

    What's an example of a self-help book, then? My examples would include "The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous," "Atomic Habits" (by James Clear) and "Getting Things Done" (by David Allen). They just contain useful info that makes life easier, is my perspective.

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago (2 children)

    Alcoholics Anonymous is a kkkristian cult

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  • [–] 2 points 2 years ago (1 child)

    Not exactly, it’s got some of that kind of baggage but it’s more about bringing together a bunch of people who all have the same problem to support each other and heal. I’m not a big fan of it, but it has helped millions of people recover from alcoholism.

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  • [–] 5 points 2 years ago* (3 children)

    No, I was giving some context as to why someone might react to the suggestion of self-help books with hostility, and why a comment recommending a self help book in the thread might be removed by mods for "cringe."

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