Diva comments on Could we please refrain from doing exactly what nearly got programming.dev defederated?

Could we please refrain from doing exactly what nearly got programming.dev defederated? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/main@lemmy.blahaj.zone

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People don't stop being trans because you disagree with them politically. I despise Jenner and other high profile trans grifters but I'm not shitty enough to deny their identities.

Do better. As a user of both sites this shit is genuinely upsetting. Despite how you may feel about hexbear, how can you claim that they bait people into revealing their internalized transphobia and then turn around and make shitty claims like this? I don't give a shit if you call me a tankie or red fash or whatever, but I'm trans whether you like me or not.

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[–] Diva@lemmy.ml 7 points 2 years ago (1 child)

They're allowed to be assholes, I can be a raging removed when I need to. I sincerely doubt the goal of anyone there is 'convincing them to hate the trans identity' and if a person they interact with is at the point of hating all trans people because someone was rude to them online that sounds like they already did, and were looking for an excuse.

I just highlighted it because if someone's going to say bigoted things because they got 'baited', that reflects poorly on them, and them alone. If they are incapable of taking criticism from minorities they interact with, that's a fault on their part, not the minorities for not being 'nice' enough.

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[–] Meganium97@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 years ago (1 child)

Maybe it isn't their intent, but when presented with nearly all of their recent interactions with other parties, as well as the well known hexbear brigade community, it wouldn't seem too far fetched to think that.

Of course, at the end of the day, they're always gonna be like this, and I probably shouldn't say anything further than "they're assholes" and respect them for who they are.

Who knows? Chances are they're watching my account to see what I say. If that's the case, then Hexbear, you guys can go fuck yourselves. I saw what you said about me.

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[–] Diva@lemmy.ml 6 points 2 years ago (1 child)

You're speculating that because minorities are being annoying about standing up for their humanity that they must not actually be interested in their rights at all... because in the process it might turn off people who get offended by rude behavior. For a lot of trans people the rude behavior is the lesser offense.

If that’s the case, then Hexbear, you guys can go fuck yourselves. I saw what you said about me.

I'm not going to mince words because I just posted about the issue with tone policing minorities raising issues. If you want to look sincere in the context of all these other interactions I would suggest trying to steer away from gendered language to refer to a whole group of people which we just established includes a significant potion of non-cis people.

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[–] Meganium97@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 years ago (1 child)

I feel like it's not just them being "annoying" as the incident that made this occur was them going out of their way to be offended at being misgendered as "them", as if they had the upper moral hand to get angry at force of habit.

As for the "guys" thing, that too is force of habit. Maybe I'd switch to folks, if that didn't make me sound like my now-dead grandpa.

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[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone [S] 5 points 2 years ago* (3 children)

the incident that made this occur was them going out of their way to be offended at being misgendered as “them”, as if they had the upper moral hand to get angry at force of habit.

That's not what happened. The admin did it once by accident yes, but after being corrected, he doubled down and blamed the user for being offended in the first place... which you're now repeating.

I said good on you for owning up to your bad take, but I'm starting to think you're not really sorry about saying what you did, you're just sorry someone shined a light on your behavior.

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[+] Fal@yiffit.net 3 points 2 years ago (1 child)

[removed by mod]

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[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone [S] 2 points 2 years ago (1 child)

You're so confused you've combined the original snowe comments with the comments in the screenshot for this post.

Go be a debate pervert somewhere else.

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[–] Fal@yiffit.net 3 points 2 years ago (1 child)

What? The thing you quoted was about the snowe incident

the incident that made this occur was them going out of their way to be offended at being misgendered as “them”, as if they had the upper moral hand to get angry at force of habit.

That's talking about the original snowe incident. Am I not allowed to have an opinion and respond to things you post? Are you confused what thread this is?

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[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone [S] 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

It’s not “shining a light on behavior”, and there’s nothing to “double down” about. If you accuse someone of transphobia because you’re offended at something totally unreasonable, it’s not that person’s responsibility to apologize or do anything

'Shining a light on behavior' was referring to the poster I was replying to.

'doubling down' was referring to the original snowe incident.

Am I not allowed to have an opinion and respond to things you post?

When you come in doing the exact thing that snowe originally did to kick this shitfest off, your opinion means jack shit.

Are you confused what thread this is?

fuck off lmao

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[–] Fal@yiffit.net 3 points 2 years ago* (1 child)

Are you confused what thread this is? fuck off lmao

Was a legitimate question, and basically the exact same thing you accused me of.

I'm super confused now. My point is you can't "double down" when you did literally nothing wrong, and characterizing it as "doubling down" is ridiculous.

Edit: And yes, I used your "shining light on" phrase that was in reference to something else to tie the points together. That there's nothing to shine a light on

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[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone [S] 1 point 2 years ago* (1 child)

I’m super confused now.

The only salient thing you've said so far.

I didn't start this thread to re-argue about the programming.dev admin. I started this thread to address my fellow blahaj users' unsavory behavior.

Please go away.

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[–] Fal@yiffit.net 3 points 2 years ago (1 child)

I didn’t start this thread to re-argue about the programming.dev admin

Maybe not, but you're responding to people, "correcting" them and telling them what did or didn't happen and implying that someone did something wrong. I've been perfectly pleasant in responding to that to disagree with your characterization.

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[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone [S] 1 point 2 years ago

👍

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[–] ember@lemmy.ca 1 point 2 years ago (1 child)

Huh. Theyre... gone now.

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[–] good_girl@lemmy.blahaj.zone [S] 4 points 2 years ago* (1 child)

Yeah I'm not exactly sure what happened. I was having (what i thought was) an amicable back and forth with them in DMs and then they sent a single self-destructive message saying they were just going to delete their account.

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[–] ember@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 years ago*

It sure did look like they were just digging a deeper and deeper hole in the convo I saw.

Edit: turns out eternity is just really bad at displaying comments if it goes over the thread limit.

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[–] Meganium97@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 point 2 years ago

I want to respond but I recognize I dig myself a deeper hole every time I post. I think at this point the best action is to delete my account. I'm gonna reflect. Goodbye.

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