Speaking specifically to your last example, I don't think that's quite the same, as it would imply mugging is held up as an ideal social standard to adhere to in that certain racial group, which is doubtlessly untrue. In her particular case, there are social standards of manhood and a woman's proper place that her ethnoreligious group promulgates, and she's very clear she wouldn't date anyone that adheres to those views, much like she wouldn't date a republican for the very same reason. That's going to, in effect, result in her not being willing to date a large portion of that group.
Like would it be racists or discriminatory (with all of negative connotation entailed) for an ex-Amish person to not want to deal with dating other people of Amish background?