Lastly, yeah I’m dead so it’s not my problem but people will remember me for a little while more so might as well think of that too.
You have never been able to control how the people around you think about you when you are alive and won't be able to once you pass.
Everyone has their secrets and I doubt that any you have will be that shocking to friends and family.
I am not saying this to mock your preparations just to offer some perspective.