There have been a few changes over the course of my marriage. For the sake of this post, I'm gonna refer to just a few.

  1. My wife didn't want to shave/wax anymore. Cool, you do you.
  2. She didn't want to give oral anymore. Okay, that's her right to decide what she wants and doesn't want to do.
  3. We used to flirt and sext all day long and I'd be down for anything by the end of the day. She didn't want to do this anymore, to better focus at work. Okay.

These, and other such changes are all reasonable and I've respected her choices without demanding anything. She has legit reasons for all the changes she's made.

Buuuut it has come at the cost of me losing sexual attraction towards her and not being all that interested anymore.

When I reduced initiating, she picked up the mantle. Over time, I'm down to never initiating, and on most days actively turning her down. Drowning while others starve and all that.

As I write this, I can see that the comments are most likely going to be "therapy," but that's $$$ that's gonna be hard to come by. Or "have you spoken to her about it?" -- I haven't, because I don't know how to do so without sounding like "get waxed, and get on your knees."

So, help??

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[–] 5 points 2 hours ago (1 child)

Yeah she stopped trying for sure. The question is why? Maybe OP stopped trying too.

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  • [–] 1 point 46 minutes ago

    Most likely, OP probably stop doing A, so his wife stopped doing B, so OP stopped doing C, and on and on. @fmlemmy@sh.itjust.works when's the last time you bought you wife flowers, or cooked her favorite dinner, or slapped her ass?

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