High highs become the lowest of lows. Bpd ain't no joke. One day, you'll wake up after dreaming about pulling glass shards from your feet and just suddenly be too tired to ramp up. It's not a great feeling, but it's much easier maybe. Then you just use whatever energy you have left to try. Because you have to. Sometimes it's easy, sometimes it isn't. You won't have those soaring moments of clarity and hope, or the valley of despair. It'll just be questions and trying, so learn how to remember or make something that reminds you that you once had the other sides.

The middle isn't pretty, but it works. Or not. I recommend occasionally feeding the beast when you reach the middle.