I'm not even sure which position you're trying to argue with your comment? Are you saying that masking/trying to raw-dog autistic traits is equivalent to 'just dealing with it' when the temperature is a little uncomfortable? Because that's not at all empathetic or tolerant. For someone with extreme sensory issues or hyper-stimulation brought on by loud noises or eye contact or social anxiety because you literally do not understand the unwritten rules for interaction that most people take for granted, it's absolutely not the same level of discomfort as having to put on a sweater because the restaurant is a little too cold, and that's super reductive. Autistic people also don't own you shit and should definitely not be required to interact with you in anyway, let alone to your standards. Our society does have the ability to accomodate or avoid alot of interactions but if you are in a situation where an autistic individual is forced to interact with you for whatever reason, expecting them to just suck it up because "we all have to deal with some stuff" is pretty fucked.

If that's not what you're trying to say then you need to organize your thoughts better because it's not at all clear if you're saying the autistic person should suck it up, or if you're saying the NT person should just live with someone not making eye contact. It also does absolutely have to do with position on the spectrum. Yes two autistic people may react completely differently to the same level of discomfort to specific stimuli, just like two people with differing pain tolerances may react differently to the same amount of pain, but there is definitely also a level of intensity involved, not just differing levels of tolerance. Like those people with hyperalgesia. To them a paper cut may be agony, you can't just tell them 'oh it's just a paper cut, I've had one and it's fine' when they're literally experiencing the equivalent pain response to you getting your flesh melted off. That's nothing to do with mental fortitude or tolerance to discomfort, their body is physically having an extremely heightened reaction that they can't just 'get over'.