I am counterintelligent, I'll have you know. I stare at goats and doesn't afraid of anything, except how sexually attractive I found the judge who condemned me to jerking off for twenty-six sessions of anger management because my narcissistic manipulator life partner entrapped me, being my superior officer. She (the judge) had wonderfully beautiful hands that I wish could caress me while degrading me. Good thing I work for the F-I mean, the CIA, and this is just me establishing a cover story.

In three to seven years, there will be a News headline: "Hero." It will have my face as the picture. The article will talk about how I infiltrated an Epstein-type ring. How? That's classified, but damn am I audacious, and I do hope you excavate (dig) to understand the depth to why this is so damn funny to me; Q.