If the reddit comments are to be believed: straight from the parking lot into the drink

I was sober except for the part where I maybe wasn't except in a legal sense and then on top of that suffered a bunch of other ailments that made me drive into a pond, over a curb and some other shit

On good will I hand it to this person that this sounds american-with-no-alternatives as fuck and they didn't frame it as a sort of passive "I got into an accident" but like still