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Shopping in 2026 (thelemmy.club)
submitted 7 months ago by to c/memes@lemmy.world
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[–] 43 points 7 months ago (4 children)

The AI toilet will not flush if you do not use the "authorized" brand toilet paper.

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  • [–] 15 points 7 months ago (2 children)

    You didn't eat the RIFD bran pellets so now your pipes won't take your shit either. Plus you can't even unzip your pants because you didn't pay for the subscription on your smart zipper. Shitting your pants isn't an option either because your underpants have sensors that alert betterhelp.com if you soil yourself. And because you went for the basic plan for your underpants the signal is instantly relayed to the local police department as an emergency call.

    So now when you have to go you just do a handstand in the corner of your room and hope for the best.

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  • [–] 5 points 7 months ago

    You know, a few decades ago I've heard people joke about physical media only becoming download codes in the box or cars requiring software updates to drive, so you better believe this is exactly where we're headed.

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