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Cishet dudes of Hexbear: Do feel that certain gender or sexuality norms are harmful to you personally? If so, what are they and how would you say they affect you? (hexbear.net)
submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by to c/askchapo@hexbear.net
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So, back when I was "still cis tho", there were a lot of aspects of male gender norms that bothered me deeply and of course I totally understand why now. Even though these days I obviously have a clear reason for feeling that way, I'm still curious if cishet men also have issues with how norms or expectations around gender and sexuality impact them in a negative way.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on how those norms impact you, whether good or bad.

Also, I should mention that since this is a bit of a sensitive subject we're talking about here, please be thoughtful and sensitive when discussing with others in this thread. Thanks! <3

EDIT: Much thanks for all the great responses here! I know it's a difficult topic of course, so I appreciate you sharing your thoughts/feelings like this.

Speaking of which... I just looked at /c/menby and some of the posts on the front page there are over 2 years old. I see a lot of the discussion here centered around not being able to share feelings and/or not having the spaces or support to do that in. /c/menby seems like the perfect place for that, just sayin'.

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[–] 4 points 2 years ago

You've gotta be so weird about women to fit in with other dudes.

Women?? Oh, you mean feeeeemales?

Fuck, it makes me cringe so hard when dudes say that. Just the other day I got the "men / females" red flag, but it was my literal first day of work at a new place so I couldn't really say anything. Hate that fucking shit.

Had a friend the other day tell me about how "females" in a relationship are different than "men", but since he's my best friend I could break down for him why literally all his points were wrong and he got it but, damn, it's so constant. Dudes just expect you to literally dehumanize and hate women all the damn time, and if you don't then you're a sensitive white knight snowflake.

It's worse being a woman on the other side of that, of course, but it's still so annoying to be thought of as being cool with that in-group.

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