I agree with a lot of what others have to say but what makes me upset is how no one gives a shit about it. People will pay lip service to the idea of loosening these norms but the vast majority of people still expect it. Even among more progressive people, they won't make you a pariah but they'll still treat you differently. It's just like everyone agrees that women should be allowed to have both a career and children. But in practice the woman is expected to take on the burden of childcare. People can say that men should allowed to be emotional but if they catch you crying then you're forever something different in their eyes.
I've talked with a lot of my friends and I genuinely believe a lot of men are aware of how toxic these behaviors are. But the second they get in front of their partners they're back to that cold, confident mask. Most young men understand it's bullshit but they see it as a requirement for relationships and societal respect. While there are always exceptions, I wouldn't say they're wrong.