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Cishet dudes of Hexbear: Do feel that certain gender or sexuality norms are harmful to you personally? If so, what are they and how would you say they affect you? (hexbear.net)
submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by to c/askchapo@hexbear.net
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So, back when I was "still cis tho", there were a lot of aspects of male gender norms that bothered me deeply and of course I totally understand why now. Even though these days I obviously have a clear reason for feeling that way, I'm still curious if cishet men also have issues with how norms or expectations around gender and sexuality impact them in a negative way.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on how those norms impact you, whether good or bad.

Also, I should mention that since this is a bit of a sensitive subject we're talking about here, please be thoughtful and sensitive when discussing with others in this thread. Thanks! <3

EDIT: Much thanks for all the great responses here! I know it's a difficult topic of course, so I appreciate you sharing your thoughts/feelings like this.

Speaking of which... I just looked at /c/menby and some of the posts on the front page there are over 2 years old. I see a lot of the discussion here centered around not being able to share feelings and/or not having the spaces or support to do that in. /c/menby seems like the perfect place for that, just sayin'.

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[–] 33 points 2 years ago (1 child)

I think I'm emotionally underdeveloped because of male gender norms. Specificly the norm that men are not emotional. It feels like my non-male friends run laps around me when it comes to navigating their/others emotions.

The harm of this deficiency it no doubt obvious to most. But it took me a long time to even recognize that it was a problem. The harm I've experienced from this is the damage I've done to my relationships throughout my life.

Caveat - I'm not sure how much responsibility societal pressures bear alone since my parents were not great emotional models.

Other then that, I think I've only benefited from gender norms.

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