It sounds like the worst holiday ever. Getting together with your racist uncle to celebrate the whitewashing of US colonialism? Man I feel you. At least the food is good, but at what cost? 
Anyway, story strong around the holiday season my friends.
My family ditched the turkey bullshit years ago and we just order stuff from a local barbecue joint. Then we make mashed potatoes and baked beans and live off the leftovers for like a week.
I'm telling you, turkey doesn't belong on a plate, it belongs in sandwiches in thin processed slices