Bagpipes of invisibility. Turns you invisible, but only when you are playing them and they are LOUD.
Still good enough to give an attacker disadvantage in a fight, but the player won't be using them to sneak into anything lol. Eventually I had the player I gave them to receive instructions from a master bagpipes player on how to play them without using their hands as a minor upgrade
I think the implication is less "this guy will call the police" and more "this guy is a creep, call the police". Not saying that's a fair association to make with this type of facial hair, but that's my interpretation of the creators intent.