I'm confused how you got to this conclusion because in my opinion, Discovery is pretty much a masterclass in treating their queer characters as normal. Stamets and Culber's relationship is core to a lot of episodes, but the fact that they are gay is not—I can only think of a single time the word "gay" is even said. They're full characters in their own right that just happen to be in a relationship. Queerbaiting would be if they hinted at a queer relationship but didn't show it, but they show it plenty. They aren't perfect either, they literally almost break up. They're whole people.

And Adira and Grey... Adira has to come out, yes. I don't know what's wrong with that. You seem to think it should just be a "normal thing" that isn't discussed, but coming out is an inevitable part of the non-binary experience. People in Star Trek aren't mind readers, and seem to still assume binary pronouns by default. So it's only natural that if someone wants other people to use they/them pronouns for them, they have to come out, even in the future. I think the fact that Adira was able to come out in a single brief scene and then it's never mentioned again is great and not unnatural at all.

And Grey's transition is alluded to as something that happened in the past, but is literally never directly mentioned in the plot. I don't think the word "transgender" is ever uttered. He seems like the perfect trans character for you, his transness has nothing to do with who he is and is never directly mentioned but he's just accepted for who he is. What's wrong with his portrayal?