To get to new jersey where all the cool people outside Chicago are.

To proselytize midwestern thriftiness to the spendthrift heathens.

Fresh seafood (ocean version) because a 7 hour train to Seattle seemed a bit much, they aren't building a train to the Hudson Bay, and you absolutely aren't going to Louisiana

because they have Mamdani

To get real Pizza

To see your mother, Brian. Why don't you call more often?