Big difference between blundering your queen and giving it up for a gambit.
For example Hikaru got the enemy king out in the open and stopped them from castling. It wasn't a free queen.
Most ~2000 players can play the standard openings. Giving up your queen for a position that you understand better than your opponent is an advantage. That's the whole point of gambits.
If I knew my opponent knew a gambit then it would be dumb to play it against them because the gambit is going to get me nowhere. The gambit turns into a standard game going into the end game and depending on the gambit I might be worse off, it's not going to give me an advantage.
But I agree with you that you should never just resign because you "blundered" your queen. That's just poor thinking.