"I like everything about cryptocurrency except all the things that are wrong with it".

Not really sure why currency has to be "outside the control of any single person or entity". Other than an intellectual curiosity. Currency is inherently social. Goldbugs keep harping on about the inherent value of gold, but its value is just as socially constructed as cowry shells or giant granite rings. China was a huge trading party in the time before the Opium wars and it preferred silver to gold.