For me it was both. I realized how bad some things really were like you but also understood and could forgive a lot of things better.

But anyways besides all the practical things about raising a child I want to leave these quotes here because I actually think the most important thing when raising a child is being as aware of oneself as possible.

“Whatever you repress, whatever you don’t recognize in yourself, is nevertheless alive. It is constellated outside of you, it works in your surroundings and influences other people.”

“Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment and especially on their children than the unlived life of the parent.”

~ Carl Jung