People often compare fediverse with email. But it is email as it was in 90x, not as it is now. Ant it was not that great that time, tbh.

Ideally, you need to select an instance which is already quite solid has enough users, has several admins and clear financing and which is not the most busy instance because we want decentralisation.

This is really an issue for kemmy as well as matrix - recommendations how to select a server contradict each other 🤔