this post was submitted on 24 Nov 2023
800 points (97.6% liked)

Microblog Memes

5765 readers
3631 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 48 points 11 months ago (3 children)

"I'll just have to learn as we go"

[–] [email protected] 28 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

"I'm gonna grab a couple beers"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I find a couple "couple" to help things right along.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

People who teach by trying to explain everything all at once are doing it wrong. Piecemeal everything.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

for some reason this actually works pretty good

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 28 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I was so heavy into MTG in highschool and now when my friends start explaining new combos to me I black out

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago (1 children)

MtG is very much a "you had to be there" kind of game imo. I play weekly, and I love it, but the moment someone starts describing their build or whatever, my eyes glaze over.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 27 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Me learning regex for the 5000th time

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

Me: Where the fuck are we putting the slashes today

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 25 points 11 months ago (2 children)

As a table top enjoyer I generally prefer to explain the Big Idea to people up front. Then explain the specifics as we go. This works pretty well for most people

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago

Yes, top down explanation of the game is the best: this is how you win, this is how you get there, this is what you do on your turn, etc. so many people try to explain a game starting with what you do on your turn and the player doesn’t even know what their goal is.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The other great tip I've learned (for games and life) is explaining the rule before the exception.

Let people mull around the usual way things go for a bit before introducing all of the instances where things don't.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

And honestly I forget a lot of rules and exceptions of many games or I don't get the chance to properly explain.

So my rule of thumb is to allow it this time only or provide some special restitution so that they know the rule for next time.

ExampleSomeone tried in Catan to put a settlement one road away from another settlement, before I could say specifically where settlements could be placed. I let them spend the cards and have a free settlement coupon to use once they had an appropriate place to settle if they wanted.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Me when my brother brings some new over-complicated boardgame every time we hang out.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 11 months ago (5 children)

The entire game is them explaining the rules tutorial style… and the next time it’s a different, totally new game instead of the same one twice.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Also they've already played it like 12 times and know the meta so you are going to lose.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (1 children)

We bought a star wars board game for a decent amount of money. Kids wanted it (20+ year olds) and once we got it home the directions were literally 60+ pages.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago (2 children)

If Yugioh taught me anything the most important rule to rememeber is, fuck the rules I have money.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

that quote lives rent free in my head all these years later

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (4 children)

I miss playing various card games, only because it took you forever to actually learn the stupid things, but of course by the time you were starting to feel some mastery, your friend group suddenly gets over its MtG or Texas Hold Em Poker era.

So now you know what a big blind is and you won't even use that knowledge again, with any luck, because it would mean throwing the retirement savings away on fuck all.

Shit man, I miss Apples to Apples, to say nothing of getting trashed and playing Cards Against Humanity, what a time that was.

Exploding Kittens. It's designed by the guy who drew The Oatmeal. There's black holes involved. About the time we all got sharky on the ruleset oh, we're not playing this anymore.

Fucking card games, man.

Card game doesn't even mean "played with little bits of cardboard" anymore.

No, it means "video games where cards are used as a play mechanic" now. Fuckin card games.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago (5 children)

That's why I draw the line at UNO (ok, with the exception of Gwent).

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Classic UNO with physical cards, or (one of) the digital versions of the game?

(I just switched the direction, so it's your turn again!)

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

but wait, are you sure you don't want to play VR Uno with realistic card turning action?!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago

I have the highest of all pixels and most realistic movement and physics in reality so far.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago

When I was a kid, my grandparents tried to teach my mother and I how to play bridge. We never figured out how to play bridge, but we laughed and laughed because it was just so confusing.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago (1 children)

There are 52 cards and you pick them up.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

My sweet child discovered this game on the Internet and demanded I play "52 pickup" with him.

I had him explain the rules. The I asked him to simulate it. He throws all the cards down... One giant pile. Then picks it up again.

I love this kid so much.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (5 children)

I learned recently that struggling to learn the rules to tabletop games is a very common symptom of ADHD

[–] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago

Quite sure that's a pretty common symptom of being human.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Everything is a symptom of ADHD these days.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

Bro I'm just trying to throw a breadcrumb to folks who may not realize they have ADHD yet. Struggling through life not knowing why you find things so difficult that most people find easy is a hellish experience. I've got a friend who wasn't diagnosed until her 30s and the diagnosis was a game changer since the diagnosis allow her to identify resources and services to help her live better that she never would've considered without a diagnosis

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I have adhd, I'm the one reading the rules to explain others how it works

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Yeah, I just can't. Board games/table top games are a huge no for me. I get frustrated and bored, and I am a whole lot of not fun when I'm either of those things. (So I just avoid them and everyone benefits)

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

So I have 13 or 3 – I’ll stay.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (2 children)

What annoys me is when people don't explain how to win. In know what happens every turn in texas holdem, BUT HOW DO I KNOW IF IM WINNING OR LOOSING?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

EZ. If your hand is T̸̢̡̡̡̡̧̡̡̛͖̦͉̖̖̹͓͎̫͎̙͚̟̼͓̯̹̣̥̩̖̦͖̩͍̻̪̤̭̺͎̟͉͎̺͍͕͍̘̟̰̈́̇̀̇̓̎̄̀̋̏̾̾̋̓̿̑̐̇̆͌̒̀͒̇̌͗́̏̌͗͌́͐̒̅̌̅̈́̈́̌̔͒̾̾̃̓̂̈́͆̋̿̌̎͌̽͋͊́̈͑̈́͑̀͗̏́́̂̒̚̕͘͘̕̕̚͜͜͝͠͝͠͝͝h̸̢̡̢̢̢̢̫͙̼͈̗̻͚͍͎̩̘̣̩̯͙͉̟̝̓̒͒̌̔͌͆͑̏̂̀̑̔̑̍̃̒̒̀͐͊̇̀̀̀̎̃̅̋́̈́̅̈́̓̓̚̚͘͘ȩ̵̧̡̨̛̛̛̛̛̬̣̗͙͍͈͚̤̱̳͕̗͎̰̼͇̥͈̟̖̪͍̗̤͈̤̃͆̊̓̎̈̏̊͑͂́̆̋͑́̀̓́͂͑̉̐͆̑̊̉̋̌͆͊̋̈́͑̄̀̑̂̽̃̉̈́̄̀̓͋̉͊́͊̈̉̍̈̑͐̂̓͗̅̐̍͂͂̑̇̍̓͋͗̈̈́̄̔́̈́̆͊̅̓͗̾̊̀͊͂̎̔̉̀̈̈́̀̿̉́͘͘̚̚̕͘͠͝͝͝͠͝͝ ̷̛̛̙͓̯̣̥̦̦̰̬̞̱̤̱͚̪̥̣̮̥͇͓̠̝͖̖̺̾͋́͊̓̋̅̽̑̈́͛̐̾́̈́̿̒͗̓̍̎̊̅͐̾͋̃̇̍̍͑͐̃̋̊̿̈́̔̇͛̋̑̾̈̈́̍̑͊̉͋̉́̓̀̈́̈́̂̒͂͆̅͐̉̍͌͗̋̎̉͌̎̔͛̉̍͋͗̈̐͋̂̈́̔̾̉̅͋͑̾̇͗̍̾͌̑̊͌͊́̅̍̑̉̓͘͘̕̕̕͜͝͝͠͝͝͠͠͝͠͝b̸̨̛̛̛̛̛̛͚̜̟̥̙̪͓͙̥͉̠̠̮̓̐̂̃͑̋̀̐͛̎͛̀̿͒̎̑̊̊̔̏̈́̓̔̽̅͗͒͋̃̍̉̄̃̈́̓̇̈̎͂̀̓̇̃̏̔̌̈́̈́͊̉̒̒̆́͊̎̈́͌̓̉̒̔͌̀͂̑͛̇̓̇̍͛̎̐́͌̆̉͑̇͐̂̔͛̈́̍̏͌͋̑̀͊̕̕̕̚̕͜͝͝͠͝͠͝͠͠͝͠͝͠į̷̧̡̨̢̧͕̺̖͎̦̭͔̙̜̹͙̩͎̺̹͍͓̺̟̣͕̭̹͕̲̱̱͇͓̺̥̗̩̹̩̯̰̘͎̭̭̝͇̫̝̗̺̺̺͎̦̙̼͚͓̲̭͙̫͚̰̫͕̣͓̮̬̼̬̼̳̪̂̍͗̽͋̈́̏̄͌̑̈́͒̈́͛̽̅̉̀̍̕͜͝͝͠͝ģ̵̢̨̡̧̛̛̛̛̣̮̜̳̙̻̫̫͓̯͉͇̜͉͓̩̠̪̩͓̼̹͔͉̜͈̻̲̬̲͎̣̻̤̗̻̩̩̞̟̳̦͔͚̯͔̪̗̂̄͗͒̍͐̈́͊̑͌̈́̈́̉̈̍̇͗͂̋͑͑̂͐̀͗̂̈́̆̒̐̀͒̂͂̌̇̾̈́͆̃͗́͑̈́̀̇͊̓͘͘͘͘̕͜͜͝ͅg̴̨̧̨̨̗̹͎͖͙͚̤͖̭̳̼̹̥̻̤͍̰̤̫̰͖̙̰̤̹̣̳̻͉̞͍̟̬̗̺͚͉̼̘̗̱͔̠͙̳͙̪̲͍̜̣̺͇͖͇̺̫̮̙̭̝̭͇͎̻̱̗͇͔̲̜̖̪͎̱͐͆̽̿͌̾̑͋͐́͛̿̕͜͜͝ͅȩ̵̢̛̛̱̭̖͖̖̜͉̲̜̜͊̈́͑̈̉̋̄̓́̎̈́̈̎̋́̈̓̉̍s̴̡̨̢̢̧̢̢̛̛̝͙̻̬̰͙̙͈͍͓̘͇̳̥̮͈͖̲̖̼̜͓̙̳̜̜̙͚̰̣̹̭̞͇͉̩̲͓̣͍̯̟̰͉̖̖̣̖̟̱̫͕̫̫̜̞̝̰͙͙̳̟͕̗̣̥̗͙̼̒̇͛̏͑̎͌̈́̂̏̔̓̈̋̿̀̆̉̅͛̓̄̈̓̈́̅̐̒̎̇̊͂̽͋͋͆̓̓̐͌̇̑͆̆̀̾̆͐̌̿̍̊̍̌̉̓̋̍̓̀̉̐̽̑̈́̓́̊͂̂̂̉̅̒͆̈́̀̆̀̃̌́̀͛̄̾̈̀͐̓̀̆̇́̓̋̒̓̑̓̚̚̚͘͘͘̚͘̚̚͠͝͝͝͝͠ͅͅt̷̢̛̛̛̛̛̫͇̟̭̰͎̱̗̹̖͔͍̹̄̀̓͋̉͗͑͌̓̈́̈̂̉́̏͆̍̈́͌̂̇̾͗̈́̓̀̊̃̎̐͐̑̄͗͛͂̏̍̈́͌̇̈́̀̇̈́͗̾͒̒̑͑̏͋̂̍̉͗̎̈̿̎̂̉̈́̿͑̂̅̒͐̓̃̈́̍̎͗̇̀̎̎̏́͂̇̾̉̄́͌̆͗̚̚̕̚̚͜͝͠͝͠͠͝͠ͅͅ , you win the round.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

You dont learn to play card fames by sitting and listening to rules. Thats how you forget all the rules. You learn by playing a round with the safety on. You can ask everyone about cards you have if you dont understand them and play your turn. The only thing that needs explaining is how you win or the aim of the game. Thats how i learned munchkin, exploding kittens, bang etc.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I was taught Canasta at least 7 different occasions I can count. Still don't know the rules.

I mean I was drunk on all 7 occasions, but still.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Well you see, one of the features of problem-solving card text is the use of commas and semicolons to separate different parts of an effect. Commas and semicolons have very specific meanings in context, and understanding them is important to resolving card effects properly.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

Image Transcription: Twitter


joe @goulcher

my brain as soon as someone starts explaining card game rules to me

[*An image of a boy in a vehicle. His hand is placed over his mouth with his eyes squeezed shut

[–] [email protected] 4 points 11 months ago

The only game this happens with me is backgammon. I never remember how to play, and hearing the rules makes my brain just tune out.

I do not like backgammon.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago (2 children)

The rules to Hearts are absolute nonsense.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

This was one of my favorite parts of playing the card game Mao growing up. The only way to learn the rules is to play. And the only rule that you can be told ahead of time is that the goal is to get rid of your cards.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 11 months ago

Anything with tons of memorization like Bridge or Chess.

load more comments
view more: next ›