we appreciate you highlighting the ableism in this and we can second the missing missing reasons being especially useful.

She attacked me

no she didn't. you are having a conversation on the internet.

She delusionally tried to lump me in with her oppressors just because I used the word “ideal,” for fuck’s sake!

no she didn't. she said that you were framing a lack of transphobia as an ideal rather than a floor by using the word ideal.

I used “ideal” as in “better than the alternative”

no you didn't. you couldn't have. ideal doesn't mean that.

I am really getting sick and tired of being libeled like this. I am the furthest thing from a goddamn MRA!

no one called you an mra. i pointed out that you were using an mra dog whistle.

You’re the one who brought [gender] into it.

gender isn't some vampire that's only relevant to the conversation once someone invites it in, it is a societal force that we live within. it is always relevant. this is basic feminism.

Self-defense is not tone-policing!

this is not self defense because you are not being attacked. you are having a conversation on the internet.

Do you realize that, by being incredibly accusatory and hostile to people who are trying to be your allies, you’re only making the worst outcome for yourself more likely? Don’t blame this shit on me!

this is tone policing and victim blaming.

attacked

delusional

abuse

self-defense

bully

attacked

it seems like you aren't differentiating between what someone says about your ideas and what they say about you. it also seems like you aren't differentiating between feeling attacked and being attacked.

it is reasonable and compassionate to treat an oppressed minority with grace, even - especially - when they criticize their oppressors. being "accusatory and hostile" is a normal, expected reaction to lifelong persecution. putting extra effort into engaging compassionately is moral even if you disagree with them.

it is reasonable to expect this from you.

when you frame this - extending grace to an oppressed, suicidal woman - as "sexist," you are flattening gender relations into an imaginary "all lives matter"-esque concept where all genders exist under the same conditions. this is literally an anti-feminist dog whistle of men's rights activists.

you should treat her better because society is biased against her and has instilled that bias into you. you are obligated to correct for it.

this means you do not fucking tone-police the oppressed.

...i think i'm going to go find somebody to hug.

i sincerely hope that you never interact with another trans person again. we all deserve better than this.

you were talking about cowbee

What a pain in the neck

you really weren't subtle, nycto

we're really glad that you do too. thank you <3

you're right, i'm so sorry for focusing on the wrong kind of subjugation and dehumanization. if i can humbly ask - could you provide me a list of which kinds i should object to and which i should sit quietly and take? so sorry if that's too small potatoes to be worth your time.

if you tell someone that they're doing something harmful and they keep doing it because they didn't like your tone, they are still the problem. cultural appropriation is an issue because it is done on a systemic level - trying to convince indivuals who need to be coddled to listen is a waste of time.

please don't leave out the space in trans women. trans is an adjective that can apply to a woman like tall or cis or happy. 'transwomen' as one word implies a thing seperate from women, rather than a descriptor that applies to some women.

wow. this is the worst post i've seen on this platform.