Ask Lemmy

I was on the subway, standing, recently when an elderly man got on board. I'd guess he was in his 70s. Had a crutch under his arm. Had one or a few small bruises on his face. He looked frail. No one with a seat made any effort to offer him their seat. He stayed right near the doorway of the subway, and I thought "oh, maybe he's just going one stop." He wasn't. He just didn't expect anyone to vacate a seat for him.

I remember the subway before personal music players, and now 'smartphones' were ubiquitous. From what I can see, common courtesy has fallen sharply with the rise of 'smartphones' (and the concomitant "I'm walking around completely oblivious to my surroundings and focused on what's on the 4 inch screen 4 inches from my face")

My biggest aggravation are people who cut into entry lanes whilst in traffic just to get maybe ten cars ahead because their time is soooo much more important than anyone else's.

I had a much longer list of other things that I had typed out, but I cut it out. I don't want to be putting more negative out into the world than needed.

So yes, despair is constant, seeing people have so little regard for their fellow human beings. We're all sharing this world, we're all trying to exist. Though that's not to say it's all bad, there's a lot of very selfless things people do every day too. It's easier to see the negatives, but there's definitely good out there too.

I feel we have been taught to ignore the social contract and compete with each other for survival instead by the increasingly capitalist structures among us.

Also, in most countries a smaller proportion of the population is 'bought in'. Home ownership is way down. A lot of days, I kind of passively hope for collapse because the status quo is shitty. So there's little incentive to uphold the social contract for me because there's little hope it will result in a good outcome for me.

And this makes perfect sense and is predicted. As wealth inequality rises, social contract breaks down

It's a bit of confirmation bias. Once something "big" happens to you, you start seeing little things that you'd before just write off.

But a part of it is the increase in homeless people. Many of them, thanks to mental illness and drug addiction, can't follow a social contract.

Of course, naturally, they get left on the street where they ruin everyone else's day instead of being forced into an area where they can exhaust themselves out, and get their illnesses treated.

Because that would cost too much money, of course, as if letting those people lose their grip on reality and break shit doesn't already cost money.

The reason we are seeing a version of Idiocracy in action is due partly to us no longer being able to keep up with the excess of information and partly to mindless inhibition of education.

First, there is a lot of information to cram into the heads of children and there needs to be a reform and streamlining of education in general, if we are to keep up with our status of development. Unfortunately our civilization as a whole has reached a centurial gap between its forefront and its general body. Most of our capitals, which are supposed to be shining beacons of our achievements, are instead living museums of our evolution. The outer husks are nothing more than tribal huts made of mud, barely rediscovering the wheel and fire.

Second, cuts are being made heavily and exhaustingly poor in the department of education on a global scale more or less, and the focus on forefront performance causes everything else to degrade rapidly. Whether cultural, religious, economical or plain idiotic, restrictions are being added one after the other and create a vacuum that simply disrupt the well being of our society.

Education needs to be comprehensive in order to be effective in every facet available. Ours currently isn't.

Yes, but from a slightly different viewpoint. Namely, people are so disenfranchised from their society on average that the idea of a social "contract" makes no sense. People are not at all represented by "their" governments, and in their righteous anger they conflate the oppression by governments with that of their people.

If you put on a crown and shout that you're better than me, I'm not going to respect your authority by default. You need to give a reason to do so, such as protections, rights, privileges, opportunities, camaraderie, etc.—or the implied or explicit threat of violence against those who disobey the law, as is the current setup. Right now, the only thing that my government does for me is wage wars in foreign lands, building ill will and corpse piles on my behalf. For many people, their government harasses them or just wants them straight-up dead.

I think that many people confuse the ill-will of governments with the avarice of their ordinary citizens [1]. It is, at best, tied to the apathy of their citizens, whom have themselves been relentlessly beaten into understandable submission.

The point I'm making is this: if people are already out to destroy you, what good is the social contract to you? Fuck them. This is the attitude that drives people not to care for others.

Now this lack of care for others is not my viewpoint! I do separate the actions of the state from the people they "represent" as much as is possible [2]. However, I'm in a position of relative comfort and privilege. I have the energy to take a fraction of a second and cool off when I start to see myself blaming humanity for things. Most people don't.

Lastly, in regards to situational awareness and common courtesy specifically...I really had to learn that, and I'm not the only one. "Do unto others as you would want done unto you" doesn't really work for me because I generally want different things than others. I have difficulties reading social cues. Even as an adult, I have to go far beyond "Do unto others..." to suss out what the right course of action is, because I typically would want something else or nothing to happen. Situational awareness and common courtesy are not inherently obvious or intuitive, and I think we do a disservice to ourselves by pretending that we don't generally learn courtesy from others.

[1] In areas where street justice is a thing, it is not at all uncommon for the public to side with non-state bullies in conducting oppression, although usually still with tacit state support.

[2] Patriots and ultranationalists do exist unfortunately. Non-state ultranationalists need to be taken to task along with their state-sponsored brethren.

I just went to Japan and Korea, and seeing the difference between there and here (US) is jarring. You’d almost have to go there and spend some time immersed in it to pick up on the many ways they cooperate and help each other - from the government, to safety regulations and equipment, to the day-to-day interactions. We could really learn something from them.

Absolutely,.

All the time. There are things many people do which cause me (and others) physical pain because of a medical condition. They don't mean to cause me harm, but because they have a mental model of everyone sharing similar abilities as themselves, it simply doesn't occur to them that the one small thing they're doing has negative consequences for others. It's a monkeysphere thing, it's nobody's fault.

I get past it by remembering that I am also incapable of remembering everyone's needs at all times. I'm sure there are many things I have done which seemed completely mundane at the time, but affected someone else negatively. No matter how hard I tried.

The people who still do things like casually block the entire sidewalk with a heavy rental e-bike still pisses me off. But, not for as long as it used to. And if it's something I can fix for someone else who can't, I'll try to do that too.

I also try hard to ensure I actively remember other people's needs where I can. If I can create less suffering, I think that's a good thing to try for.

The nihilistic energy of the early 2020s isn’t new but it has been front and center for awhile. I’m hoping it fades.