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Why do we hate the people who are easily fooled rather than the people who are doing the fooling?

The problem is willful ignorance. A lot of Trump supporters knew better from day 1 and chose to be easily fooled. I had a friend when I was a kid who used to cheer on the defendants in court cases when he thought they were guilty of heinous crimes because they got to "fuck with the system" if they got off. People like that grew up to vote for Trump because he would "fuck with the system".

I think it's ok to hate someone who voted for Trump BECAUSE they wanted to elect an enemy of the majority. It might not be productive to hate them, but it's okay to.

How long and how loudly... how open will their distaste for right wing

We're dumb evil immoral pedophiles who are going to hell, and every time we try to cooperate with them in any way they backstab us and then blame us. What exactly are we losing standing up to them when they're going to punch us whether or not we do?

I am starting to feel like you could just switch a few words around and then the shit we believe about them and the shit they believe about is identical

The concept is assymetry. The most obvious (Godwinian) example is to take virtually any anti-Nazi quote and intersperse the word "Jew". All of a sudden it becomes horrible and bigoted. You can absolutely then take any anti-Jew bigotry and say the word "Nazi", and it suddenly becomes just and true.

Why? Because Trump Supporters and Democrats ARE fundamentally different. The best answer to the paradox of tolerance says that tolerance is a social contract - we are to be tolerant to those others who accept to follow that contract, but it can be open season (in terms of intolerance, not violence) for those who do not.

I don't think it's about feeling some kind of superiority. I think it's important to keep telling each other this so we remember - this is who they are. They are not rational thinking individuals.

The reason being that we cannot waste any time or energy thinking they can be redeemed. All our energy needs to be spent on making sure we vote and everyone we know votes. Because they will be voting and voting Trump, and won't be changing their minds. And that vote is a threat to our freedoms and our democracy.