this post was submitted on 26 Feb 2025

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Life Goes On (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 day ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 39 points 9 hours ago (3 children)

I do believe this was made with best intentions but it has major "just be happy" energy and is made from a position of privilege.

Just getting a therapist for example is a huge battle. Having supportive friends is not ubiquitous. Changing jobs is risky and in certain financial circumstances almost impossible, especially with dependents.

That said I approve of the message that without living there is no possibility of things getting better. My advice is to focus on small maybe even tiny victories daily making lifestyle changes where possible.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 minutes ago

And I do believe, that it's not the comic that was made from the position of privilege, but your fucking comment. Who the hell are you to approve it or not and spread out your advice instead? Come on, check yourself first

[–] [email protected] 1 points 37 minutes ago

I respectfully disagree. Its thesis is simply that you can have a better life if you stay alive. The "proof" is simply all the changes the artist went through in order to find a better life. The changes aren't supposed to be a recipe on how to make your life better - I don't think the artist is telling people to divorce their spouses. There isn't anything "just be happy" about getting a divorce.

[+] [email protected] -7 points 5 hours ago (3 children)

Privilege? Risk? The guy was about to kill himself. He had nothing to lose. I see your point on kids, but barring significant hurdles (which most people don't actually have), most people motivated enough can significantly change their circumstances. They just don't want to.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 58 minutes ago* (last edited 58 minutes ago)

I can upload some data for you.

I have a phone call a to crisis centers who told me "you don't have a crisis" and hung up on me. I have a recording of an on-call psychiatrist tossing me out of the ER after saying "don't try making this my responsibility" after I literally said I'm afraid I'll hurt myself or others, and asked what happens if I walk out of there and toss myself under a truck. "Don try making this my responsibility." Like, my man, it's literally your legal duty ffs.

I've got photos of an isolation cell the cops put me because they denied me my prescription meds and I went a bit cuckoo from the way they treated me. (absolutely no information of rights I didn't know if I was detained or arrested or to be put in prison), and I drew over 300 words in my own blood on the walls. No-one helped. Up for three days, supposedly under supervision. The only thing I got was them cutting off my water and snide remarks bullying me on the radio.

Several dozen doctors who've just dismissed me.

Literally all of my family and friends, when I even carefully try to talk about suicidal ideation, they'll cut me off for months and months. My mom hasn't rang me for several years to ask me how I am. Yet they all pretend it's my fault and my personal failing that I'm not getting help, because every single one thinks "not my responsibility", and that includes an on-call psychiatrist I told I'm afraid of harming people.

So yeah, kindly fuck off with your victim blaming.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 49 minutes ago* (last edited 48 minutes ago)

"significant hurdles Which most people don't actually have"

Interesting argument against privilege... buddy, we know you've had an easy life so far, which is great for you, yet no one thinks this way due to careful observation of others.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 hours ago

What do you mean with "they just don't want to"?

Quitting your job, potentially losing your shelter and food supply is a hell of a risk. Presume one actually wants to get better, they first need to be well enough to handle such a risk. Otherwise, they are homeless and suicidal: A great recipe to get well /s

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 hours ago (4 children)

Lemmy people are not happy because this guy is

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 hours ago

Non-depressed Lemmy users when depressed people act depressed:

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

I think it has something to do with the guy saying he thought of his daughter.

Like, motherfucker, how was your child not at the forefront to begin with? If you were prepared to end your own life you were prepared to abandon your child.

I get it, though. It is sending a good message through a personal story. But it is fucked up, though much like the topic of suicide itself, so it is probably inescapable.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 34 minutes ago* (last edited 33 minutes ago)

I get it, though. It is sending a good message through a personal story. But it is fucked up, though much like the topic of suicide itself, so it is probably inescapable.

The message was botched, though. The cartoonist said they can show evidence that "we" (the passive you, whatever) can change our lives, but the only evidence was about themself. I believe they don't know shit about anyone elses life or problems and are falling on survivor bias saying "just do what I did!".

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 14 minutes ago) (1 children)

Misery likes company, not perspective. Fuck happiness, yeah?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 39 minutes ago

People do prefer company to being told. I lost my brother to suicide, really messed me up bad. I did some volunteer work on a suicide prevention service, and people really just want a little bit of your time in the immediate sense, and social support structure long term. Most people have this with families, but it can get really bad when that falls apart due to anything negative in that space of their life.

I know the saying is supposed to mean ''you'd rather make other people miserable than work on yourself'' but in a social sense, company works a lot better than telling someone it's not working and walking away.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Wow you weren't kidding. Bunch of depressed commenters with a mentality of "change is hard" makes you understand how they got depressed to begin with.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 23 minutes ago

Depression isn't caused by laziness. There's clinical trials and everything, fascinating stuff if you want to look into it.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

I think honestly another way to put it is that pain and suffering are merely unpleasant signals intended to actually prevent you from dying. Death itself is a lovecraftian horror.

I think I'll take the unpleasant signals.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Death itself is a lovecraftian horror.

Death is what you make of it.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 4 hours ago

I'm not sure what you mean. But I suspect that is cope.

[–] [email protected] 100 points 1 day ago (5 children)

It's more true to say that you can't find a better life if you don't continue living. But that's not a guarantee that you can.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Survivorship bias. In this case also quite literally?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 hours ago

You're not wrong but fuckin hell, that's one way to put it.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 23 hours ago

indeed, sometimes your reward for perseverance is more suffering!

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That's the spirit!

(but you're right of course)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 17 hours ago

Because of the way comments are ordered, I thought for a second that you were replying to the guy saying "being a ghost might be fun too"

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 day ago (9 children)

Ok so if I can't afford to find even a simple therapist finding a good one lol !

Always those with money giving life advice.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

Just take the money from the rich. And if you are hungry eat the rich.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 hours ago

Oo-de-lally!

[–] [email protected] 17 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

https://openpathcollective.org/ provides a long list of therapists that work on an affordable, sliding scale

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 hours ago (2 children)

US only and still 30$ to 70$ per session !

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 hours ago

Well ig you can find a good friend or a crack head to vent to if nothing else works out. Anyway, hope things work out for you in case you are in need of one.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Well wouldn't any other country offer therapy for free? Is it counted as medical care?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 hours ago

Depends on country. In Canada only some provinces provide it

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 day ago (5 children)

They think they have figured out some other secret other than freedom to make mistakes because they have the financial backing to make them is what sets them apart.

Life is full of people thinking that if other follow their exact steps it will work without realizing the things they have differently, such as money and resources, even just skills or biological quirks, do make quite the difference in being able to followed.

I'm not against them sharing it worked for them but that's as far as I feel it goes.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 hours ago

Fully agree with this comment. This is why I always tell young people "if you don't know what you want to do, chase money"; because it you find out you want to do something else but you're not rich enough to do it, you're screwed

[–] [email protected] 0 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Just because the variables are different doesn't mean you can't find a correct answer. There are no two situations that are the exact same. The comic is just a success story for motivation.. is it really that deep? Pessimism must be exhausting.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 hours ago

In life there really isn't correct answers. There are your answers. Everything comes with a heavy dose of reality being complicated.
I would say it doesn't really speak to motivation. Their motivation was to leave everything behind and start over which isn't very motivating past being able to do so. It doesn't lead to happiness it just changes the days you have which may feel better while it still feels new.

Everything we share is a chance for others to understand us more. It might not be deep but it is a perspective shared that I'm just pushing back against.

Is it really pessimistic to just disagree with a point of view that I find to be a poor message or is it that way cause you want to assume the motivation is correct to handling life?

Why can't it just be that this is my perspective that I share out for others?

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